So it’s tough when you see someone you care about hanging around with a total jerk. If you speak up there’s a real tendency for your friend to get all defensive about the jerk. At moments you realize how bad this guy has been to you, America. Heck about four years ago you almost ditched him. But then you went crawling back. Hey, it happens. But now, now you’re ready to move on from that controlling, violent nitwit that you’ve been with for the better part of this decade.
Here’s your choice: you can hook up with one of his friends. Sure this guy will tell you that he’s a “maverick” and that he’s different from his pal, but watch him shrink from this kind of stance once your man comes around. The other choice is a new guy who doesn’t have quite so much baggage. Maybe he’s not got the experience, but at least he seems cool. That’s it, cool. He’s not afraid of fight, but he won’t drag you into a bad one either. Look, I don’t agree with the new guy on everything, maybe you don’t either, America, but trust me, I think most of the rest of us would prefer that you get away from that crowd you’ve been hanging with since 2001.
What I’m saying here is that we’ve all winced watching you in this terrible relationship, now you have chance to leave all that behind. You’ll be much better off, and I think the rest of us will get to see your better side again. What do you say, America?
It would seem that the Conservatives, their bloggers, and their special media friends would want you to believe that. Ordinary Tim Horton’s-drinking Canadians are supposed to love Harper. Harper is a POPULAR leader in this estimation. (Side note: Yesterday I did my own oil and filter change on the car and then went and bough a Timmies coffee – still not a fan of Harper).
How about this though? Harper, being so super-duper popular, won a whopping 37% of the popultar vote in the last election! He’s not unpopular like that confused old John McCain! But wait, what’s that? McCain’s miserable, failing campaign is still garnering 40%+ of the popular vote south of the border! Stephen Harper is a paper tiger, he’s less popular than John McCain.
In all the discussion of Bristol Palin’s pregnancy and what this does to her mother’s nomination I feel like there’s one figure who has been overlooked. Bristol’s fiancee and baby-daddy, Levi got a raw deal. I mean the 18 year-old grew up in a state where the governor didn’t believe in sex education aside from telling kids not to do it. Levi, if you’d only grown up somewhere that there was an acceptance that, no matter parents said, teens were going to mess around so they’d better have some idea what they were getting themselves into. Now you’re stuck though, staring down the barrel of shotgun wedding at the behest of a woman who likes guns.
Now Levi, I know you called yourself a “fucking redneck” on myspace. I guess that makes you sound tough. I hope, for your sake, that you are. See, your new father-in-law has a drinking problem and your new mother-in-law has no compunction about using her office to pursue personal vendettas. Watch out for these people, Levi, first Mrs. Palin made sure you didn’t hear about condoms and now she’ll make sure you lose your job if you screw up.
I don’t have too much to say about this – it’s the sort of thing that doesn’t have much bearing on Palin as a veep nominee. This is going to have an impact on the race though, here’s why: People like James Dobson might be supportive, but I can’t help but think that this is going to dump cold water on the evangelical base. I’m sure it beats an abortion for many of the so-called values voters, but still, I think this is inevitably going to dampen their enthusiasm for Palin.
I turned on the news in the background a while ago and CNN was breathlessly reporting on the imminent release of the name of McCain’s veep nominee. I flipped over to BBC and the announcer said not to expect it for another couple hours.
There are pictures circulating of Obama doing, well, what politicians do when they travel, dressing up in traditional garb. If this is what Obama’s opponents have, well it’s truly pathetic. Once Obama shrugs off all of these attacks by the Clintons, I suspect he’ll be all that much more prepared for McCain.
There’s a significantly better chance that McCain will die in office than any other candidate. It’s macabre to say so, but inescapable all the same. Even if he lives through his hypothetical term(s), McCain must surely have the greatest risk of being otherwise incapacitated in office. Who McCain picks as a VP nominee will matter.
If you had told me back in 1988 that the political endorsements that would make the news would be those of Chuck Norris, Hulk Hogan, and Arnold Schwarzenegger, I imagine that I would have said, “AWESOME!”
That’s because I was a ten year-old boy in 1988.
Seriously, why are the fake superheroes of the 1980’s so culturally relevant? Who will Sylvester Stallone endorse? How did McCain get Arnold’s endorsement anyway? I imagine that there was a conference call that went something like this:
Arnold: This is good, but what is best in life? Mitt Romney: The open steppe, fleet horse, falcons at your wrist, and the wind in your hair. Arnold: Wrong! John McCain! What is best in life? John McCain: To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of the women. Arnold: That is good! That is good.
Actually, that may have also been the conversation that earned McCain’s Giuliani endorsement too. What about Obama and Hogan? Will Hogan offer to let Obama use this as his campaign song:
